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Conversations with Koreans: Where are you from?

It doesn’t matter how much Korean I speak, or what I’m even doing, this question is bound to come up in every conversation I am having with a Korean. I guess it makes sense; I’m clearly not from here. You can either have fun with it, or get really good at answering this question so much so that the next question will be how you learned to speak Korean so well. One of the top five questions first asked when you talk to any Korean in Korea is “Where are you from?”

world map

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Sometimes I just wonder why it’s so common. Yesterday, I was just picking up some milk tea in my local convenience store and as I was checking out, the cashier asked…

Cashier: Where’d you come from?

Me: Across the street…

Cashier: No, which country?

Me: Oh, the US.

Cashier: LA?

Me: No… Ohio…

Cashier: Oh…

In this instance, my immediate response to say that I came from across the street made the most sense because why would a cashier want to know what country I came from? I’m still going to purchase that tea I just handed over.

US map

When I was in high school, I got my first job at a Panera Cafe and I never once asked someone that was ordering food where they were from. Not once. Yet, I’m asked by cafe waiters, restaurant owners, teachers and people sitting next to me on the bus consistently.

At least once a week, this question floats into my ears and almost every time my immediate response is to say where I just came from before I met this person because why would someone sitting on a bus honestly be interested in what country I come from? Though, why would they care where I just came from at the same time? And usually, the conversation tapers off after the conversation…

Taxi Driver: Where are you from?

Me: The US

Taxi Driver: New York?

Me: No, Ohio.

Taxi Driver: Oh…

(Since we’re in a taxi and I have a ways to go yet, I decide to continue this conversation.)

Me: Do you know it?

Taxi Driver: No.

Me: Choo Shin Soo, the Korean baseball player played in Cleveland for awhile. Cleveland is in Ohio.

Taxi Driver: Ooooh, Choo Shin Soo. Yes, Cleveland.

Me: Yes, Cleveland is in Ohio. Also, you know the guys that invented the airplane? The Wright Brothers? They are from Ohio too. Actually, they’re from my hometown.

Taxi Driver: Oh.

Me: Yes, there’s also a lot of corn fields there.

Taxi Driver: I like corn.

Me: I don’t really like Korean corn. I like Ohio corn better.

Taxi Driver: ((grunts))

Me: Ohio has also had seven US Presidents born there.

Taxi Driver: Oh…

Sometimes I just like to see how interested people really are so I continue on with the Ohio facts for awhile. Usually, they’re not very interested at all. After I say I’m from the US, I’m generally asked if I’m from LA or New York because those are the only two places that anyone seems to know about here so, a little Ohio education is definitely needed.

At first, I used to think Koreans were asking so that they could find some commonality between us to further a conversation but usually after this conversation I follow up with, “have you been to the US?” and invariably the answer is, “no”. It would make sense with the way I assume conversations go that if someone says, “LA?” when asking where I’m from, they’re putting forth that option because they’ve been and can add something to the conversation in the event that my answer is either yes or no. Not the case. It seems they’re generally just taking a census and that is all.


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16 Comments

  • Jennifer

    I relate to this post because I’ve experienced similar conversations like this on a weekly, if not daily, basis. I’ve lived in Korea for several years, and over the course of that time, my feelings about being asked where I’m from has changed repeatedly, I used to find the question amusing, and then perplexing, then annoying, and now I have come to understand and accept that it is simply curiosity.

    But wondering where someone is from, is not unique to Asians, as someone wrote in the comments section below. I’ve found that pretty much everything can be mirrored in the US.

    I come from a multicultural family and grew up in Nevada. I get asked often where I’m from or where my parents are from. More often than you’d think.

    If you don’t “look” like you’re a “native” of that place, I guess it’s natural for people to want to ask. I know this curiosity applies in Europe, and I bet it’s safe say in most places.

    I personally try to avoid asking people where they’re from unless they open the door to the topic. Not because I’m not curious, but because I know how it feels when my appearance is the focus of a conversation with a stranger. Whether in the US, Asia, or Europe.

    • Hallie

      Yes, I agree. It’s definitely not unique though I think it stands out here because of the responses for me since no one ever knows where Ohio is but people are SO interested when I say the States first.

      I have tried to avoid the question from time to time too but then I also find it helps to understand where someone is coming from to better understand the perspective they’re coming with. Even in the States, I’d probably ask anyone I met regardless of what they look like but purely because someone’s perspective of the US if they come from Texas is VERY different from someone like me from Ohio. I literally had cousins growing up in Texas tell me the south didn’t lose the Civil War… now that was eye opening… mostly on our educational system. But knowing where they were coming from was important to why they thought that was in fact history (when it isn’t).

      • Jennifer

        Sure, though I feel like you’re missing the point. You’re asked this question more often here than in the States because you don’t look like you’re from here. You wonder why they ask and you conclude that they’re “just taking a census and that is all.”

        My geography of Italy is fair, and if I were to ask an Italian where in Italy they were from, as long as they were from an area I was familiar with, we’d have a lot more to talk about than if they were from an area I have never heard of. I could talk about how I lived there as a kid and talk about Rome or Naples. Change the language to Italian, and the conversation would basically something similar to the examples you wrote above, because my poor broken Italian wouldn’t be able to cut it. I would like to ask them more about their hometown, but guess what, if they can’t speak English, and I can’t speak Italian, it’d be pretty hard to have much of a conversation.

        Are you having these conversations in English or Korean?

        Do you now ask people where they’re from? In your post you wrote, “I got my first job at a Panera Cafe and I never once asked someone that was ordering food where they were from. Not once. {…}why would someone sitting on a bus honestly be interested in what country I come from? Though, why would they care where I just came from at the same time?”

        Have your feelings changed about being asked where you’re from?

  • christian ray

    Hi its good to know that you’re from Ohio, i like the people in Ohio coz they were more polite compared to people in New York and Cali (not generally). I was working in BPO Industry (Call Center) here in Philippines and i love the people their, though I only received calls from Columbus Ohio. but i can say that the people their were good. 🙁

    i can relate to that Korean people asking Western people where they came from, i think its normal especially in Asian people. Its our way of communicating or trying to make a conversation with you guys. And partly of that is were just not that used to see Caucasian people in our place. Lets just say were amazed seeing you guys in our place. hehehe 😀 😀 😀

    • Hallie

      Yes, though the world is becoming more and more multicultural and mixed. Isn’t it? Some of these things I write on will surely change. I’m glad you had good impressions of Ohioans. We are pretty polite I think, haha. ^^

  • monicast

    People in Japan, when they find out I’m from Tennessee, try to ask me if I know the Tennessee Waltz (a famous song apparently) and I have no idea how they know it… Usually they keep asking me “where is it? near New York? near California?” and I just want to be like “Look at a map and stop asking me!” T.T But I think they just want to be polite and say something since they know you are a foreigner. I like to ask Japanese people where they are from and they get confused and tell me, “Japan!” thinking that I won’t know the actual region they are from when I do. People in Korea and Japan sometimes surprise me with how much they know depending on if they’ve traveled ^^

    • Hallie

      Yes, I often respond afterward by asking where they are from too and they always say Korea and I’m like.. Yeah… Clearly. What city? What state? I think it’s funny that Koreans always guess NY or Cali whereas I just ask where without saying.. Busan? Daegu?

  • Hedgers Abroad

    Haha love this. We always get asked this question as well. We always respond, “Yeosu.” In America we would never ask this, however we do have a wider diversity of people from all over the world.

    • Hallie

      Yeah, exactly. My first response is always, Mapo-gu or of I’m near my house, “down the street”, “over there”. Haha it was just such an uncommon question growing up that even now even though it’s so common here, my mind doesn’t first respond with the US. Funny how that works I think.

  • Shelley @Travel-Stained

    Haha, this is hilarious…funny people never ask me where I’m from when I buy things. 😉 Though I was in a taxi once and the taxi driver asked me to write a cute love note to his daughter in english for him. Btw…I saw “Ohio corn” in Homeplus for the first time last week… individually packaged. :p

    • Hallie

      Ohio corn?!? Clearly I’ve told enough people here how good it is that the demand is now high. I will continue promoting Ohio and all things in it to those that ask where I am from. It’s catching on.

      • Shelley @Travel-Stained

        Lol… well I don’t actually know if was from Ohio, but it was yellow, at least. Isn’t all yellow corn from Ohio? 😉

  • ScentedSilkScarf

    I think the “where are you from” question in the US depends on your location and situation. In Arizona, nearly everyone is from some other state. It’s pretty rare to find someone who’s a 3rd generation or greater native. Also, if you speak with a non-local accent, you are likely get asked where you are from but only in the context of getting to know a person. A random stranger or store clerk during a short interaction will not ask this type of personal question.

    • Hallie

      Yes, I totally asked this question of the exchange students in my high school art class but we were at the same table and getting to know each other. Asking random people I will never see again seems strange and hence my reaction when asked here in Korea. To me, if the local convenience store clerk were asking me where I’m from as in where is my house it would make sense because it could lead somewhere. “Oh that’s why you come in so often” or something that makes sense in the situation and context.

  • RakSiam

    Maybe they have family or friends in LA or NY? And perhaps you’ve met them? 🙂 You’re different from everyone else there so they are curious. I get that all over Asia as well. And usually they don’t speak much English so that’s one of the few things they can ask me. Are your conversations in English or Korean?

    • Hallie

      Usually these conversations are in Korean. After I speak a little Korean to get something or give directions in the taxi, then this question comes up. I understand I am an anomaly, it is just an amusing line of thinking to me because I wouldn’t immediately ask someone this question that just wants to purchase a milk tea. ^^

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